Free ebooks!

The following Kindle ebooks (all of which originated on this website), will be available completely free this weekend:

Earthwatch Uncovered

Earthwatch UncoveredEarthwatch Uncovered lifts the lid on the popular MMBC tele-immersion series exploring earthling life on the Pale Blue Dot. The book reveals the story behind the short-lived but top-rated series that gave us a tantalising glimpse of the lives and aspirations of those much-loved earthlings. You will also be introduced to the presenters, smolin9 and polkingbeal67, allowing you to understand their behaviour, what makes them tick and why they do what they do. It also sheds light on the sequence of events that led to the abandonment of the series. Discover what happened to the earthling Voyager 1 space probe, revisit the fascinating encounter between polkingbeal67 and the Queen of England and learn more about smolin9’s relationship with his earthling wife. Join the Earthwatch team as they help you to unlock the mysteries of interplanetary life.

Click here to pick up your Kindle version (available for free on 25/5 and 26/5)

Man Flu

Man FluSomething strange starts claiming the lives of birds in the West Hill dominion. There are no external wounds, no signs of struggle, no readily obvious cause of death. The inner circle, under the presidency of a charismatic robin, decides that humans are responsible.

The word goes out that all contact with humans is forbidden and, most significantly, bird feeders are declared off-limits. The penalty for breaking the embargo is severe.

Click here to pick up your Kindle version (available for free on 25/5 and 26/5)

Off The Frame

Off The FrameAfter a tongue-in-cheek beginning that will seem very familiar, especially to younger readers, this short story bounces like a mis-hit tennis ball from one episode to another as it follows the progress of Jez Bell, would-be tennis champ, on the trail to Wimbledon. Desperate to discover what he must do if he is to make it in tennis, Jez asks his friends for advice. His mentor at the tennis club tells him: “You have to be utterly dedicated. It involves sacrifices. The best thing you can do is give up junk food, smoking, drinking and clubbing.” So Jez immediately embarks on a quest to discover the next best thing! Accompanying the story is ‘Sidespin’, a collection of random snippets of conversation from Upper Gummtrey Tennis Club.

Click here to pick up your Kindle version (available for free on 25/5 and 26/5)

The Wormhole Reports

Wormhole ReportsThe Voyager 1 space probe was launched by NASA on September 5, 1977, to study the outer solar system and, ultimately, interstellar space. It carried a gold-plated audio-visual disc in the event that it might be found by intelligent life-forms from other planetary systems. The disc carried photos of the Earth and its life-forms, spoken greetings from people including the President of the United States, Jimmy Carter, and a medley of sounds from Earth, including whales, a baby crying, waves breaking on a shore and music, including works by Mozart and Chuck Berry’s “Johnny B. Goode”. It got picked up by two itinerant spacecombers from Morys Minor…

Click here to pick up your Kindle version (available for free on 25/5, 26/5, 27/5)

Talking Trousers (and other stories)

Talking Trousers‘Talking Trousers’ is the story of a mouse that is given the speech gene in an experimental research laboratory. In ‘Santa Comes Down The Wormhole’, a space outlaw discovers the Voyager space probe and decides to visit planet Earth disguised as Santa Claus. Also in this collection of short stories for children are the following titles: ‘Bonaparte Breaks A Wing’, ‘The Burping Cow’ and ‘Ivy and Holly’.

Click here to pick up your Kindle version (available for free on 25/5 and 26/5)


My next book will be the ultimate key to the map of life, a jeweled window to the soul of mankind, an illuminating journey through the complexities and mysteries of the human condition. In the meantime, just make do with these stories about little birdies and wacky space aliens.

About thespeedofdark

David Winship has written an unauthorised autobiography and several critically disdained literary tomes. His work is frequently compared with Steinbeck, Orwell and Hemingway, but unfortunately Mike Steinbeck, Daisy Orwell and Howard Hemingway were all terrible writers. He has been totally overlooked for the most prestigious literary awards worldwide, which is a shame as most of the words are spelled correctly. In fact, his books contain material that ranks with the finest literary works in history: all the right letters are there, just not necessarily in the right order.

Dave’s blog (The Speed Of Dark Blog) is part of his crusade for truth and justice and universal entitlement to free real ale. It may well be that his whole purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.

Amazon Author Page

Category(s): Earthwatch, Off The Frame, Story, Wormhole Reports
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