The Voyager Series
The official home of the Voyager Series. Find out what happens when Voyager 1 gets picked up by two itinerant spacecombers from Morys Minor...
woke up, fell out of bed
"I read the news today, oh boy."
A sincere and unequivocal attempt to make nonsense of a range of topical issues of the day...
Here is a catalogue of my prose writings, including children's fiction, short stories, non-sequiturs and odd scraps of surrealism with or without a straightforward narrative. Don't believe me? Well, to prove it, here's a picture of a man being fired from a cannon:
Scientists are racing to find dark matter in the universe. You may find some of it here in the form of conspiracy theories, dark secrets, sinister and bizarre tales...
Raising a racket at Upper Gummtrey Tennis Club...
The downloads on this site (e.g. pdf versions of Earthwatch and Shackleton's Shed) are free. If you would like to donate a small sum of money to be invested in the upkeep of the site then please scroll down to the bottom of this page and click on the 'Donate' button. Somebody sometime has got to make money from the internet. Let it be me.
This intergalactically recognised award was presented to The Speed Of Dark Blog by The Speed Of Dark Awards Commission.
I am delighted to have been nominated for the 2012 Tony Blair Ducking Under The Bar Award for boldly raising the bar and diving under it. I knew I had the potential to be a great underachiever. I've racked up another prestigious award - the Eric Morecambe 'Mister Preview' Prize. According to the award citation, The Speed Of Dark Blog contains material that ranks with the finest literary works in history. All the right letters are there, but not necessarily in the right order.
This is just to draw your attention to a totally awesome feature of this blog. A random aphorism/one-liner/quote now appears at the top of the page AND, if you click on it, you get another one!! Too much of a good thing can be truly wonderful!
Don't sign me up!
Category Archives: Satire
“The important thing is to have a target.”
Deadlines make headlines. Whether the Health Secretary’s target gets met or not, all the attention on the target will serve as a smokescreen, distracting the public from the truth that far too few tests were carried out during the first … Continue reading
Posted in Dark Mutterings, Humour, Opinion, Personal, Science or Pasta Tagged COVID-19, pandemic, testing kits, virus tests
The reboxetine drug trial scandal
Reboxetine is an anti-depressant drug marketed by Pfizer under the tradenames Edronax, Norebox, Prolift, Solvex and Vestra. Approved for use by the MHRA, the organisation that governs all drugs in the UK, it was first introduced in 1997 and millions … Continue reading
Posted in Dark Mutterings, Science, Science or Pasta Tagged anti-depressant, Edronax, MHRA, Norebox, Pfizer, Prolift, Reboxetine, Solvex, Vestra
Do or do not. There is no try.
The UK’s leading cinema chains have opened a can of worms by announcing their intention to ban an advert featuring the Lord’s Prayer before the new Star Wars film. While I agree that the cinema should not be used as … Continue reading
A good day for bad science
Today was a good day for bad science. A plethora of health-related science stories hit the newsstands. Amongst other extraordinary assertions, we were advised: i) that watching television while surfing the internet and checking social media on smart phones may … Continue reading
The Andy Murray formula
So Westminster has promised Scotland a continuation of the Barnett formula. This pledge, ostensibly an attempt to persuade voters in Scotland to vote no to independence, has been signed by the three major party leaders, David Cameron, Ed Miliband and … Continue reading
Posted in Humour, Nonsense, Satire Tagged Alex Salmond, Barnett formula, David Cameron, devo mix, Ed Miliband, Holyrood, Nick Clegg, Scottish Independence, Scottish referendum, SNP
Woke up, fell out of bed …
Obama approved tapping Merkel’s phone ITV News, Sunday 27th October 2013 Barack Obama was told three years ago that the National Security Agency was monitoring Angela Merkel’s communications and allowed it to continue. Previous Next WUFOOB Archive
Posted in Satire, Woke up, fell out of bed ... Tagged Angela Merkel, Barack Obama, National Security Agency, phonetapping
Global warming is on ice Morys Minor’s most watched news channel MMBC News The British Met Office has lowered by 20% its previous prediction of how much hotter the planet will get in the next few years. Which is inconvenient, … Continue reading
Posted in Humour, Nonsense, Satire, Voyager Series Tagged al gore, global warming, Met Office, MMBC, MMBC News, Morys Minor, smolin9
Niffis and the Chemical Weapons Debacle Morys Minor’s most watched news channel MMBC News As you know, all Chilloks are supposed to be vaccinated with compounds that neutralise their formic acid. The Naaffab leader, Keshiak, who was recently reinstated as … Continue reading
Posted in Humour, Nonsense, Satire, Voyager Series Tagged chemical weapons, Chillok, formic acid, MMBC News, Morys Minor, Muqu, Naaffab, Niffis, President Keshiak, yukawa3
The Niffis Crisis Morys Minor’s most watched news channel MMBC News More than 50 Chilloks have died in fresh violence in the city of Niffis, as Naaffab protesters loyal to the ousted President Keshiak clash again with security forces. Behind … Continue reading
Woke up, fell out of bed …
Pensioners are pushing many cities and states towards financial crisis The Economist, Friday 26 July 2013 Pensioners are pushing many cities and states towards financial crisis. Previous Next WUFOOB Archive
Posted in Satire, Woke up, fell out of bed ... Tagged illegal immigration, NHS costs, pension bill